..I Will Succeed..

Wednesday started out rough.  Had a difficult time getting out of bed, felt so incredibly tired and rundown that I just wanted to cancel my plans and hibernate under the covers all day.  Instead, I dragged myself up, got dressed, did my hair, makeup and made myself something to eat.  It literally took all the energy I could muster but I did it and managed to get out of the house in time to make the appointment I had at 10:45.  I indulged in a haircut, which was honestly badly badly needed anyway, but the hope was that it would help me feel better.  And I was right.  After leaving I felt a surge of positivity.  I was still feeling tired but pushed through and headed on with my day.  It would have been easier to just drive back home and curl up on the couch watching tv and surfing the net but I refused to give in.

I managed to get myself to David’s Tea (for yet another indulgence), lunch with my Mom, the flu shot clinic with Sofia, Superstore for some groceries, made some pasta sauce for dinner, and carved pumpkins with the hubby, Sofia, and my sister.  All-in-all ended up becoming a great day and I’m pretty happy I didn’t stay in bed wallowing away and gradually feeling worse as the day went on.

It’s not an easy task though.  Most times my brain overrules my mind and especially if I’m out in public, my fight-or-flight response kicks in and I’m fleeing.  Much easier to handle myself in a situation I can control.  I’m fighting through it though.  Trying to get out more and do things despite my anxiety-fleeing feelings.  I even drove on the freeway today despite the sweaty panic attack that ensued prior to embarking on the exit ramp.  One step at a time, right?  And one day at a time.  I will succeed.  I will beat this.

Thursday is a new day.  Hoping to tackle some household chores and enjoy Halloween.  Looking forward to trick-or-treating with my Fia girl and looting through her treats at the end of the night.  Did I just admit that? Ummm, … it’ll be our little secret 😉

Happy Halloween everyone!

..I Will Succeed..

..One thing to note, when you’ve just had the flu shot, it’s best not to viciously itch said arm and vulnerable area.  Ouch..


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